“Are you taking yourself for granted?”
That may seem like an odd question, but I’d like you to ponder it for a moment.
Do you find yourself feeling indifferent towards your personal and professional accomplishments?
Do you think that others’ accomplishments are impressive, while assuming yours aren’t anything out of the ordinary and not exceptional?
This is very common. One of my coaching clients had a great session a few weeks ago when she came to the realization that she has always taken herself for granted.
Most of her life, she’s had a Type-A personality; independent, goal-oriented and highly driven; she always looked for something to strive for. Once she had achieved a goal, her focus shifted immediately to the next, bigger and better project.
During our coaching session it struck her. She realized that she’s never valued the accomplishments she’s had up to that point in her life.
It was as if she thought of her accomplishments as small tasks on her “to do list” that she had checked off one day. She didn’t feel successful or that her accomplishments were really that important. Through coaching, she was able to realize she had the tendency to compare herself to what others were doing, and she never felt like what she did was good enough.
Together we identified how this feeling of not being good enough was being reflected in her career. Always having the entrepreneurial spirit, she tried her hand at various businesses: professional caterer, franchise owner, therapist, and direct sales consultant. Taking herself and her accomplishments for granted severely impeded her marketing and business building abilities. With each business she was able to achieve a certain level of success but ultimately sabotaged and limited herself beyond that. Self imposing as it was, it showed up over and over because she depreciated her own self-worth.
After coaching her through the TransCovery process – developed by Dale Halaway of Seminars that Inspire, I had her begin listing all of her personal and professional successes up to that point. She was very surprised by what she saw. Not only the number of accomplishments she was able to identify, but also the significance of each success surprised her. Taking a step back and thinking about her list more objectively she found herself really impressed.
At that point she realized how much she had taken for granted the time, energy and work she put forth to achieve the small and the large successes that made up her life. She was able to recognize the significance of those triumphs and challenges.
Only once you are able to recognize your own value and appreciate what you have to offer can others do the same. Until then, you will attract people and create circumstances that will reinforce the lowered value you’ve placed on yourself.
You may begin noticing:
- You accept from others less than you truly deserve.
- You limit yourself in building a successful business.
- You over-work yourself.
- You under charge for your products or services or give too much of your work away.
- You do not show yourself appreciation through positive self-care by taking care of your physical, emotional, mental, and social needs.
I invite you to take a few minutes for some self recognition and start your own list of accomplishments and successes, both large and small. It may be a bit challenging at first, although once you get on a roll, just like my client, you may be pleasantly surprised by all that you are and all that you’ve done.
If you find this exercise to be helpful, consider creating a Success Journal. A Success Journal is a place to write about or simply note anytime you have a personal success. We sometimes habitually slip into taking ourselves for granted. A success journal can help remind us of the positive things we have accomplished and what we have to be grateful for. It’s a wonderful reminder of the value we bring to both our personal and professional lives.
Have you been taking yourself for granted? How has your life been affected? Leave a comment and share your story!
Angela, The Goddess Next Door
PS. If this article resonated with you, consider Transformational Life Coaching. You could see life changing results (increased income, better relationships, more confidence and greater overall happiness) once you stop taking yourself for granted.