Feb 242014
 

As the weeks go by the drama unfolds…on the Bachelor that is. It happens every season.

There’s the girl who becomes an emotional wreck and downright needy. It’s easy to recognize when you aren’t involved. As an outside observer we see the unhealthy patterns, but when it’s your situation it’s almost impossible to see.

pretty little liars

At one point or another haven’t we all been “that girl?” I know I have!

We all want to experience true love with a man who adores us. Sometimes we want it so badly that we ignore red flags. We don’t want to believe that it’s not going to work. Sometimes the relationship is destined for disaster and we just can’t or won’t see it. 

Wrapped up in romanticized feelings towards a guy I’d fall head-over-heels in love with his potential, the fantasy of what I wanted him to be, instead of who he really was. The men I attracted weren’t quality men. I’d fall in love so quickly, I wouldn’t have the chance to learn that before my emotions were involved.

Once I became aware of the deeper beliefs driving my relationships and began changing the beliefs I had about men and love I started attracting higher caliber men. It’s a natural process that happens by resolving old emotional wounds because anything we don’t resolve from past relationships reinforces our beliefs and relationship patterns, negatively affecting all future relationships.

If any of this resonates with you and you feel you have unresolved stuff from the past you’d like help with I’ll be launching an online program called Love Rehab in the next several weeks. If you prefer to work with me one-on-one, check out my Love Intensive Coaching.

PS – You can see first hand what it’s like coaching with me. Watch what Christine & Martin say.

Dec 292013
 

Businesswoman pulling a businessman's arm

Does this sound familiar?

You’re a confident, independent, fun and spontaneous woman…when you’re single.

But then…

You fall for a guy and when he starts pulling away you suddenly become this clingy, out of control, crazy woman you don’t recognize. You find yourself saying and doing things you would’ve never done when you were single.

Trust me, I know what it’s like. I use to be one of those women and it feels terrible.

Men talk about it all the time.

A guy starts dating a “really cool girl”. They start spending a lot of time together, everything seems to be going great. At a certain point the guy begins feeling secure about where the relationship is headed and so he starts spending more time doing his own thing and hanging out with the guys. All of a sudden this “really cool girl” becomes super clingy and wants to do everything together. He feels like he can no longer please her, starts backing off and distancing himself. Enter the crazy woman. He  has no idea what’s going on, he feels her become Needy and he’s gone. Never to be heard from again.

So what happened?

She had an old love program that got activated, she got scared and started chasing him. In his mind she became desperate and needy. Two things men find highly unattractive.

Here’s the deal…we all have needs.

It’s not that you shouldn’t have needs but when you try to get your needs met from someone else (a guy in this case) those needs become Needy, driving you to out of control thoughts, feelings and behaviors.

We all have the capacity to become Needy until we upgrade our internal Love Programs. When we expect a man or our partner to fulfill our needs and we don’t take care of our own needs we become Needy and push the man away. Needy energy repels men. They don’t want to feel responsible for taking care of your needs. That becomes a heavy burden.

I want to help you get your needs met without becoming needy.

During my Love Rehab program there is an effective process I teach to upgrade your Love Operating System. These are the steps:

1. Identify the “Need” being triggered.

2. Express the feelings the “Need” has been suppressing

3. Receive what is needed to upgrade the outdated program by fulfilling your own needs.

During Love Rehab I walk you through each of these steps so you can begin the process of letting go of the blocks between you and true love.

Next post I’ll share more how this Needy energy blocks you from the love you desire.

Love,

Angela, Your Attraction Coach

Dec 242013
 

Girlfriend, are you single? or…Are you in a relationship with a ‘for now guy’? You know, the guy you date who isn’t quite right for you but you stay with him anyway because your soulmate hasn’t come along yet.

The number one reason why you’re either single or with the wrong guy has to do with an old internal process running the show. Let’s call it your internal “Love Operating System“.

woman computer frustrated3

This Love Operating System is where your relationship beliefs and patterns live and constantly run, deep in your subconscious, determining who you’re attracted to, who’s attracted to you and how you think and behave with men. The operating system on your computer (Windows for PC or Mavericks for Mac) works very similarly. It runs in the background telling the computer how to run programs like Word, Excel, and Itunes properly.

I’m sure you’ve noticed this, how everything runs great in the beginning but over time the computer starts slowing down, eventually it freezes up and you get to the point where you want to scream and throw your computer out the window…I know I’m not the only one who’s had this experience.

We don’t pay much attention to how well things are working…until they don’t. 

When your operating system is out of date your computer software needs to be upgraded. Same goes for your Love Operating System, it needs upgrading too.

We learn our beliefs about men, what love looks like, and who would make a good husband as young girls. Depending upon who we’ve learned from we may or may not have had great role models. If over decades of time your beliefs haven’t changed and grown with you you’ll find yourself in a cycle replaying the same scenario with men over and over again.

For example you may attract a similar type of guy and you don’t know why; be it the passive guy, the unmotivated guy, or the emotionally unavailable guy who can’t commit because he’s married to his career or he’s just plain married; it’s not what you want it just happens that way. I know, It’s frustrating!

When you can clearly see these patterns playing out and you don’t understand why it’s time to detox your love life and upgrade your Love Operating System.

So how do you stop the cycle? I mean, don’t each of the guys you meet initially seem great, it’s only after weeks or months you realize this guy is acting (or treating you) just like the others you’ve dated in the past?

Once you begin upgrading your Love Operating System the love blocks start melting away. The men or situations you once attracted won’t be attractive to you anymore. Instead you’ll begin attracting a better quality man. You won’t need to try to meet your soulmate, you’ll naturally attract him to you. 

In my next post I’ll share more about how your Love Operating System works.

Love, Angela

PS – The first Love Detox workshop of 2014 is right around the corner Click here for more info if you’re ready to eliminate your blocks to love.